Eat, drink and feel like a complete idiot - Posted by Maggie

Yesterday's lifestyle and entertainment section of the newspaper boasted a huge article entitled "Eat, drink, and be merry", claiming "the restaurant scene is hot-and-hoppin' and LIFESTYLE presents the country's top 50 choices." Lifestyle asked 16 food critics (who are obviously not on any sort of budget since they get to expense all their meals - you see where this is going?) to vote for Singapore's top restaurants, based on consistent quality of food and service.
Darin and I studied the list and under the Japanese section and found 2 restaurants claiming to do "Shabu Shabu". I don't know exactly what Shabu Shabu is, but Darin has been looking for a restaurant preparing this ever since he got back from Taiwan 2 weeks ago. He describes it as a sort of Japanese fondue - but instead of cheese, you cook the veggies and meat in a fragrant and savoury clear broth. So naturally we were very excited to finally find a place doing Shabu Shabu in Singapore - and the restaurant was somewhere we knew how to get to - in Shaw Centre near Orchard Road!
We took the MRT to the Orchard station and walked to Shaw Centre. Looked at the building map and located the restaurant named "Aoki" on the second floor. Finding it on the map was much easier than finding the actual place! Took the elevator up, but the first stop was the 3rd floor. Heh? How did we go from 1st to 3rd floor? Where is 2nd? Down we go again, look at map again. Ask information desk who points outside of the building, he says turn left "and keep walking". "How far? What exactly should we be looking for?" I think but didn't ask. We walk outside, turn left and up a small hill on a narrow road and come to the end of Shaw Centre. No restaurant. Go back into Shaw Centre and walk around, look at map again, go back to where we were last. Everthing indicated that the last shop we saw must be the restaurant, but there were no signs, lights or hours of business or any indication that this was in fact a restaurant. On a whim, Darin tried the door. It opened! We went inside and were greeted in Japanese by the chef shouting from the open kitchen below, and by waitressed scurrying about in half dressed japanese outfits (you know, the ones where they wear socks with flip flops, and a little square backpack on their lower backs over their kimonos). Looking around quickly, I was pleased that the place looked very elegant with authentic shoji screens dividing the booths, very Feng-Shui decorated - tres chic! The chef told us to come back at 6:30pm -another 30 minutes or so. Darin made sure they do "Shabu Shabu" and everyone one nodded solemnly, and we confirmed our reservation.
After spending 30 minutes browsing books in a nearby Barnes and Nobles, we returned to Aoki, filled with anticipation of a big Shabu Shabu feast awaiting. The server showed us our own special booth where one person enters on one side, then the shoji screen has to slide over so that person number two can enter the opposite end of the booth. Bamboo behind frosted glass made enigmatic patterns agains the wall and ceiling. The waitress smiled and brought us some tea and a very little dish with a few strips of what looked like jellyfish to me. I've had jellyfish before and don't like it at all. Luckily, this was cabbage - very tart and very chewy raw cabbage. Then she gave us the menus. We quickly scanned the menu to locate the Shabu Shabu choices, and my stomach fell when I saw that there was only one choice - sirloin steak, for $120!!! (Yes, one hundred and twenty dollars per person - about $90 US). So, first of all, I don't eat meat, and second of all I especially don't eat $120 meat, Shabu Shabu or not! So I looked at the other items on the menu and found no entree below around $36. It was very disconcerting. At that point it was way too late for us to get up and leave either.
I ended up ordering some edamame ($12 for 9 edamame beans - I counted them!) and "Seafood and Vegetable Soup" (for $18 . It came in a teapot as big (small) as a coffee cup. It was a clear broth that looked, smelled and tasted exactly like the water in which one has just boiled hotdogs. I swear, it was very salty and a bit oily, and just generally nauseating. Darin ordered the "Sole in Black Soy Sauce" and got an entire fish - about 2 inches long, with little fins, head and skin still attached. (BTW - Darin hates this - please see his entry on July 9th) He had to scrape that fish with his chopsticks to get a bit of meat off of the bones - I would say he got about 2 teaspoons full of meat all-in-all.
Our entire bill was $104 - this was for 2 teas, 9 edamame beans, one soup, one fish and one small bowl of rice. No dessert, no wine, only one entree. I felt so ripped off, disappointed, angry and frustrated (AND STARVING), yet I wanted to giggle hysterically. I also had vengeful ideas of writing a very stinky letter to the editor of the Straits Times because all we did was (not even) eat, (didn't even) drink and we felt like complete idiots (for following the advice of food critics). Next time we'll ask to see the menu up front.